Thanks Where Thanks Are Overdue

My ambivalence toward Thanksgiving is broad and deep.  It is, of course, a lovely family time, although we privileged can have that without being complicit in one of many myths we Americans create to whitewash our colonization, not discovery, of America.  Although it seems factual that one event joined native people with white folks, that was a mere pleasant speck in a sea of ugly displacement and genocide.  

It also used to be the advent of holiday commercialism, although that advent is now - what - mid-September?  

I suggest we repurposeThanksgiving to its literal meaning and give thanks where thanks are overdue.  I don’t mean “thanks” for our excessive bounty or for any of the usual objects of our gratitude.  Thanking “our troops” or first responders has become a near-cliche, uttered at events year long.  I mean no disrespect.  I was a “troop,” and neither need nor deserve thanks for my undistinguished service.  Others, of course, were heroic, although finding heroism in a just cause requires returning to WWII.  And first responders merit our thanks, including those who saved my bacon when I might have died three years ago.  But they too bask in gratitude at sporting events, community activities and in passing through daily life.

The unsung among us are the millions of people who toil in thankless anonymity, easing our lives, doing work that most of us take for granted.

• The medical staff who will empty bedpans while we fill ourselves to bursting.

•   The underpaid service staff who endure our impatience while we get a head start on holiday shopping.

• The often beleaguered delivery persons who bring purchases to our door before dawn, often using their own, old vehicles.

• The Uber drivers who will carry many a drunk reveler home safely for meager tips.

• Doordash and other service drivers who will bring you a festive drink from Starbucks, whose staff also deserve our gratitude.

• The women and men who care for our aged relatives in nursing homes and assisted care facilities - working long hours for poverty wages.

• The line cooks, wait staff and dishwashers who will not have Thanksgiving dinner so others can.

• The stockers and cleaners who will work all night to be ready for Black Friday, a most aptly named “holiday.”

• I would be remiss if omitting teachers, but they too get some regular affirmation, albeit amidst horrid political attacks.  But how about the paraprofessionals, janitorial staff and food service workers?

I could add endlessly to this partial list, but hope readers will reflect on the often - usually - overlooked women and men who ease their daily lives and selflessly facilitate our indulgences.

I write this on Thanksgiving for reasons that are clear, but my intent has no seasonal limitation.  I, perhaps you too, often forget to offer specific thanks to those whose work is essential yet unnoticed.

Try ducking your head in the kitchen before you leave a restaurant and thank the usually unseen workers who made your meal and cleaned your dishes.

If you shop tomorrow, thank the cashier who may be making ends meet because Social Security is inadequate or the clerk who has likely been the object of abuse from harried and hurried shoppers.

Leave a card and note of thanks for the midnight Amazon delivery person.

Next time you visit a hospital or other facility, make a point of saying, “Thank you for the work you do” to the woman or man who comes in to clean your patient’s room or change their dirty sheets.

I try to do this, but not often enough.  When I do, the surprised and grateful looks I receive testify to the infrequency.

Let Thanksgiving be a reminder to say the two most important words in the English language.  “Thank you.”

And, in that spirit, I wish all a happy thanks-giving.