Last Sunday afternoon my wife and I joined our daughter Jennifer and her pup Crosby for our weekly early dinner at a local restaurant/brewery. Because they cheerfully accommodate (and serve!) dogs on the patio, we sat outside as usual.
Shortly after being seated, Jen caught my attention and said, “Look over your shoulder. The guy behind you has a handgun in a holster.” And so he did. Packing heat in a family restaurant on a lovely Sunday afternoon.
This has become an increasingly common sight in our gun-besotted country. Only when fact-finding for this piece did I know that 45 states allow “open carry” - 38 require no permits. There are some minor restrictions in some states, but my dining “companion” was exercising his Colorado right to carry. It is no great surprise that Colorado’s Rep. Lauren Boebert thinks packing a pistol in the U.S. Capitol Building is proper etiquette.
As I write, another shooting was reported in Atlanta. Only hours before, the AR-15 wielding maniac who slaughtered a family in Texas was arrested. He apparently mowed them down because they had the temerity to ask him to stop firing because their infant was trying to sleep.
Despite the bullet-riddled corpses filling America’s morgues and cemeteries, there appears to be no legislative stomach for reducing gun violence, so the stomach-turning carnage continues unabated.
But the gun-toting cowboy behind me presented a real dilemma that is seldom addressed. So many politicians and pundits claim to be concerned about the social, cultural and ideological divide in our nation. We should talk to each other, they say, and develop empathy for - or at least understanding of - our neighbors on the other end of the political spectrum.
Now, I’m admittedly taking a wild guess, but the adjacent diner is probably not a progressive Democrat. If that’s so, how might I hypothetically start a productive chat while his handgun glistens in the afternoon light? The answer, of course, is that I would not. In fact, I spent the next hour in mild discomfort, knowing an armed man was only a few feet away and that I knew nothing of his intent, his temperament, or his mental health. I suspect that my discomfort, and others as well, was precisely what he enjoyed. When we got up to leave, I passed his table and quite consciously avoided eye contact.
I have long contended that the gun debate in America is not primarily about the right to bear arms. Psychologically, it is about the right to use arms. Every person who carries, concealed or open, does so because they reserve the right to use their weapon whenever they feel justified. Many claim it is for their own protection, but who adjudicates the circumstances in which protection is merited? What threat, real or merely perceived, might lead a patron in a family restaurant to draw his weapon and use it, as he believes he is entitled to do?
A great many innocent lives are taken through gun violence, but the nature of our relationships is changing too, without a shot being fired. How many times have you, or someone you know, hesitated and reconsidered when thinking of responding to a dangerously aggressive driver? I’m not suggesting that road rage is ever a good thing, but in these and countless other encounters, the risk is not worth taking.
Our freedom to move comfortably through the day is more and more compromised. It seems that every political protest draws a crowd of (mostly) men, armed with military-style assault weapons and holstered hand guns. Does that contribute to productive dialogue? When our children were barely out of diapers, we took them to marches for reproductive and civil rights as well as a few anti-war rallies. We would not even consider taking our grandchildren to a protest of any kind. I don’t even want them to see deadly weapons in anyone’s hands, no matter the supposed purpose or their legal right to carry.
The endless proliferation of gun ownership, combined with the burgeoning legislative permission to brandish a weapon in public, leads one to several choices: become one of the supposed “good guys” with a gun, preparing for a possible face-off in a Colorado restaurant on a lovely spring afternoon; or become increasingly wary of your environment and vigilantly cautious about any possible disagreement or dispute.
I choose reticence, but I am deeply saddened that this is what we’ve come to.
Well said, Steve! I share many or even most of your views on this. Here in Canada, extremely few people are permitted to carry handguns - open carry or concealed. And recently, our federal government passed legislation that bans the sale, acquisition, and importation of handguns. I will confess, that I think that this new law will NOT cut down on hand-gun related violence. It is too easy for the bad guys to bring illegal hand guns into Canada from the US, and I am of the view that this is where enforcement action needs to be taken.
don