A Vivid Expression of Privilege

During my 19 year tenure as Head of the Calhoun School in Manhattan, I was faced with a great many complex issues, as one might expect.  A few dealt with the highly-charged issues of race and racism.  One stands out and I recall it now after reading about a rather disastrously managed issue in a local school in Boulder, CO.

The historic incident - in brief - involved an Upper School student who used the N-word during the an Upper School community meeting.  He was commenting on a proposed NYC statute that would have criminalized the ugly word.  He thought that proposal was a flagrant violation of speech rights and employed the entire word in making his case.  All hell broke loose.  In short order, all faculty and staff in all divisions were furiously debating the incident and appropriate consequences.  

One faculty member resigned when the student was not expelled. It bears noting that the young man was not racist, at least to the limited extent that any white person is not racist.  He was humiliated by the reaction he drew, as he should have been.  That, along with leading some very productive discussions with his peers, Black and white, was consequence  enough in my view.  Things simmered down and life went on, with a significantly chastised young man and a slightly more enlightened student body.

The local issue arose in Boulder’s Whittier International Elementary School, a public K-5 school. It unspooled an array of actions that call to mind “how many things are wrong with this picture.”  Many. Very many.

Executive summary:  

A 4th grade white boy asked two Black students on the playground to act as his “servants and bodyguards.” The mother of one of the Black students filed a complaint. The mother was, at the time, a substitute teacher at the school and quite active in district and community anti-racism work.  The boy was “disciplined,” in the form of some counseling, a temporary alternate playground relegation and a switch to another class.  His parents were furious, in large part because the Black student (a girl) in question had previously “strangled” the boy, had a history of alleged impulse control, and was never, to their knowledge, subjected to similar discipline.

The mother of the Black girl posted a needlessly inflammatory Facebook screed which, among other things, called the boy “evil,” although names weren’t mentioned.  The family of the white boy apparently sought redress and could get no satisfaction (sing along if you wish). 

Then, the granddaddy of wrong things:  The boy’s family filed a lawsuit, naming the school, the district, the Superintendent, the Principal and the kitchen sink as defendants.  The suit claims discrimination against their son on the basis of race.  The lawsuit, while a robust 47 pages, is worth a read.  Among its remarkable assertions is that asking Black kids to be your servants is just having fun and cannot be racist because Black folks historically were not servants in Colorado.  News reports suggest that the suit is near settlement. 

I write about this not only because it is such a multidimensional cluster “gathering.” It is surely that.  But it is also a poster child for a political and cultural shift underway throughout the land.  The boy’s parents, who describe themselves as good “liberals”, who chose Whittier in part because of its diversity, seem just fed up with all this unseemly activism stuff.  As a friend recently quoted another friend, Boulder, an affluent, supposedly progressive town, is full of “. . . a bunch of Republicans too afraid to vote that way.”  The lawsuit includes sneering references to social justice and social activism as well as describing the Black mother as “peddling” her toxic anti-racism fumes.

The facts are admittedly confusing and there are no winners here.  But an affluent white family filing a lawsuit based on racial discrimination is a tone-deaf expression of entitlement.  As the Black mother pointed out, she doesn’t have the resources to file any lawsuits.  And besides, as she noted (and I vigorously agree), Black people can’t be racist. Racism requires prejudice accompanied by power.  Black folks can be bigoted or prejudiced, but not racist.  And conversely, a school, a principal, a district or a kitchen sink cannot commit an act of racism against a white kid and family.  

The Principal resigned (perhaps under pressure). The boy transferred to a private school and is, according to the suit, deeply wounded and traumatized.  The Black girl can’t/won’t go back to school. The Black mother is no longer working. 

One imagines - ya think? - that this entire mess could have been avoided with a lot more talking and fewer Facebook posts and lawsuits.  

It makes my retirement seem pretty good.